Why wont my kids sleep!?

First my 3 year old, stopped taking naps already! If i do make him lay down for a nap say 1pm or so, he will sleep till 3(forget trying to make him wake up sooner, i could throw him across the room and he wouldnt flinch until hes ready to get up). and then after that nap, i can get him to bed until 11pm or later!! My youngest, she is one...i made a big mistake i know, early on by rocking her to sleep. not to make excuses, but i did it because my husband works shift work, so i didnt want to wake him or my son everytime she would wake up...now im suddenly having HUGE problems getting her to sleep and keeping her asleep! she fights, and fights and rolls around when im trying to rock her to sleep. she now is only letting me put her down for one nap a day, a short one, and is fighting sleep at nighttime to where its as late as 11pm as well! im about to go crazy! she even wakes in the middle of the night now to make me rock her back to sleep...and on top of all this, im bf still, trying to wean her, and its like part of this problem started when i started weaning...its like she is rebeling and now trys to make me bf to sleep!! oh, im just so over whelmed i just dont know what to do!!! any suggestions will help me, ive tried putting her in her crib to fight it out, i cant just leave the room and let her cry i think thats cruel, so i sit in there with her, but how long should i wait for her to go to sleep! today, i sat in there an hour and a half! by that time, she needed a new diaper and we worked up an appitite! please please please please someone give me some advice THAT WORKS PLEASE!!!! i need that nanny 911 show or something drastic like that lol!!sorry so long....